Attack Dolphins On the Loose!
Deadly dolphins released into the wild! The Guardian reports that trained military dolphins with death darts have been released in the Gulf of Mexico!!
Experts who have studied the US navy’s cetacean training exercises claim the 36 mammals could be carrying ‘toxic dart’ guns. The US Atlantic bottlenose dolphins have apparently been taught to shoot terrorists attacking military vessels.
This is even worse than sharks with laser beams attached to their heads, because dolphins are way smart! I hate to say it, but it looks like we’re gonna have to send in some Navy seals to take care of the dolphins! Buh dun dun!