Tag Archives: Meijer

Tropicana 2.0


While I was grocery shopping last week, I noticed something incredibly awesome. Tropicana (my oj of choice) had changed the design of their box! Now, I liked the old design, but it really was looking a bit 2008. The new one looks really sweet.

I like how the orange juice is displayed in some kind of pseudo wine-glass that no one would ever really drink orange juice in. You can’t see from the picture, but the glass also runs along the other side of the box as well. Also, kudos to whoever decided to stick the leaves next to the orange cap, making it look like an orange! So genius.

I also really like the logo. Just a simple font in one color, no gradients. New Tropicana box designer: I salute you!

The Meijer-Garfield Connection

Meijer, the grocery store I usually frequent, uses Garfield the cat as a sort of product mascot. I hate Garfield. Garfield is probably the least funny comic in existence. The comics are so bad that removing all traces of Garfield makes them funnier.

So it’s strange to see Meijer use such a hated cat as a mascot. Personally, seeing Garfield on a product makes me want to buy it less. I used to like Garfield when I was a kid. It’s probably because back then, my brain wasn’t fully developed or something.

Anyway, I bought some Meijer String Cheese today. It’s pretty good, despite the existence of Garfield as a mascot.

The Meijer Free Sample Lady Saved My Life!

Yep. So today I went to Meijer for my weekly groceries. I had an extra hour, so I figured I’d be extra slovenly this morning. I made some coffee. I wasted time on the internet. Then I left. But I forgot to eat breakfast!

I only remembered this once I got to Meijer. I felt really weak, and realized I should’ve gotten food first. So I sorta just staggered around, getting stuff I needed. I went to the bottle return thingy too. Due to my weakness, I think I talked to myself a lot more (“soup get!”) and weirded people out. Wandering the aisles, I was trying to figure out if I could eat anything, then pay for it later. But that doesn’t really work in grocery stores. I would’ve sampled some Jelly Bellies, but I doubt that would have satiated my weak shell of a body.

Luckily, about halfway through the adventure, I saw that the foreign-sounding lady (“here! it’s-a very good a-pumpkin cake!”) that’s always giving away free samples at the Saline Rd Meijer had setup a pumpkin cake sample area! I ate one, and told her it was the first thing I had eaten all day. Then she gave me another! She basically saved my life, maybe.

I didn’t end up buying a cake, but I did buy lots of other crap today. So thank you foreign-sounding Meijer sample lady, whoever you are!

Orange Juice Snobbery


So since I’ve been living alone, I’ve been buying groceries for myself. One thing I’ve been drinking more of is orange juice. I’m not quite sure why; probably because I think that if I drink high volumes of the stuff, I’ll be healthier than if I don’t. And it’s sort of worked. I think pretty much everyone in Michigan is currently sick except for me.

On my weekly grocery run, I always make sure to grab at least two things of orange juice. I go through two in a week, and sometimes more. I think a 2-2-3 pattern works out nicely. Typically I just buy what’s on sale at Meijer. So far, I’ve had pretty much all brands of orange juice available. There’s Minute Maid, Tropicana, Simply Orange, Meijer brand…

In short, I’ve become somewhat of an orange juice connoisseur.

I never could make the distinction before between “from concentrate” and not. These days, “not from concentrate” is equal to “tastes like crap.” I’m drinking some Meijer from concentrate orange juice as I write this, and 1) It tastes pretty bad, 2) I think it’s giving me heartburn.

Aside from the concentrate issue, we have things like pulp density, added vitamins, etc. There was one version of Minute Maid I bought that had some kind of weird joint drug in it… Needless to say my joints were feeling great after I drank it. Perhaps this is due to some placebo effect. Or perhaps it’s due to the fact that I’m not quite old yet.

Also, there exist orange juices with an added “Omega-3” ingredient. Apparently this is good for you. But you get this ingredient from fish. Yeah, orange juice with fish in it. Not my idea of a tasty breakfast beverage. Incidentally, I think my multivitamin also has this fish stuff added. But I just swallow that whole. I guess it’s still gross, just somewhat less so.

But let’s keep on track. I’m blogging about orange juice, goddamn it! When I see OJ with added vitamins or minerals, I’ll probably go for that. Calcium is good, but normal is fine too. Last week, Tropicana was on sale. But they only had the “Low Acid” and “Healthy” versions. The “healthy” one apparently had half the sugar… I got the low acid one. And it tasted really damn good! I have to wonder where the acid went after being extracted from my orange juice. I can only hope it was used for good, and not evil.

Let’s get back to the pulp. I’ve been experimenting with pulp densities. So far, I’ve found that moderation is key; medium pulp works well. No pulp is just unnatural, and high pulp is just too chewy and hard to clean. Low pulp can be substituted if medium pulp is unavailable. The thing is, there’s no common pulp density measure between orange juice distributors. How high is high pulp? Only the juicers know for sure. I’ll continue experimenting with the pulp density levels until I reach, with a high confidence level, a consensus on my preference.

Due to cost and time issues, I have not yet ventured into the business of “home brewing” my orange juice. I think I’ll leave that job to the professionals. While there is something to be said about one who juices his own oranges, I cannot be bothered to perfect my skill in this particular craft.

In conclusion, there is no clear winner as far as orange juice brands go. I’ve only bought single brands of orange juice each week. I can say that I like Simply Orange, Minute Maid, and Tropicana. I haven’t tried the more expensive Meijer version yet. Perhaps in the future I will try a double blind orange juice taste challenge. But for now, I’ll just buy what’s on sale. I hope it’s something good this week…

Blue Moon, I Saw You Standing In The Ice Cream Aisle…

I was at Meijer today doing some grocery shopping. Because that’s what adults do, apparently. Anyway, I’m almost out of ice cream, so I thought I’d buy some more. I picked up a flavor called “Blue Moon” that I thought I’ve had before, but maybe not.

Wikipedia says it’s a flavor that’s particular to the Michiganish area. Apparently it doesn’t have a concrete flavor, with different brands flavoring the ice cream in different ways. I think it tastes sorta vanilla-ish, and after I read that it’s sorta “fruit loop-ish” I believe that, too.

What’s the point of this post? I dunno. I do know one thing: Meijer uses Garfield as some kind of brand mascot, and Garfield is the least funny comic I have ever read in my entire life.